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Having the first discussion with your daughter about her impending menstrual cycle may seem awkward at first. On average, most girls have their first menstrual periods before age 12, although this can vary from around 10 or so to 16 or older. Your daughter will get many of her genes from you which may help to determine when she will start her menstrual cycle. If you began early, then she could very well begin early. It is important to discuss this with her before she gets her first period.
Normally, girls begin to show signs of puberty a few years before their period begins. It is important that you talk to your daughter about her period early, so that you can prevent her becoming confused about the changes in her body. You want to be certain that she is ready for her cycle so that she is not surprised or embarrassed when it does arrive. The conversation may seem uncomfortable but by planning for it, you can make it a bit easier.
Find a comfortable spot that offers a bit of privacy for your conversation. Be sure that you plan enough time for her to ask any questions that she may have. You could begin the conversation by telling her about your first period. Share your feelings from that time or ask her what she already knows about menstruation and puberty. She may know more than you realize by listening to her friends.
Once you have begun your conversation, offer the basics about menstruation. Explain why women have their periods and what the changes in her body mean. Be sure that you keep it simple and allow her to ask questions when you have finished. You do not have to be scholarly or sound like a professor during your conversation. Your daughter would prefer that you sound like a caring mother rather than a textbook. You can help to prepare for the conversation by making a list of things that you want to cover when you do bring up the subject. Discuss hygiene and symptoms of your period such as headache, moodiness, cramps and bloating. Explain to her that many girls begin their periods around the age of 12, but that not all girls are alike. If your daughter has not begun her period by the time she reaches 15, you may want to consult a physician to see if there is a reason for this delay.
Be sure to explain to her that periods last for different lengths of time. Tell her that she should expect her periods to last around 3 to 5 days but that 2 to 7 days is also considered normal. Discuss the fact that periods can be light, moderate and heavy and this will vary as well as the duration of her period. Tell her also that her period will likely be irregular for the first few years and show her how to properly use pads and tampons.
Be certain that you explain to your daughter that once her period begins, she can become pregnant. This may also be a good time to discuss sex, STDs and contraception to be sure that she understands the dangers of having unsafe sex. Offer practical advice and be sure that you share feelings with her from your first period. Your daughter is becoming a woman, so be sure that you tell her this. Allow her to share her feelings with you as well. Speaking to your daughter about her period may seem awkward, but having this honest and open discussion will help to prepare her for what is inevitable in every young girl’s life.
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