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Dating experts agree that when a man does not call after a date, more than 60 percent of the time it simply means that he is really not interested. You may think that you had a wonderful date and that he really wants to see you again. The sad truth of the matter however is that some men will promise to call you knowing full well that they never will. Some may simply not see a future for the two of you or may not have long-term plans in mind. There are a number of reasons why he may not call including:
- He has a fear of involvement or commitment
- He just wanted to have a good time and when the night ended, so did his interest
- He wanted to see if he could get you into bed
- You simply are not his type
- He was attracted to you – but only physically.
- The date did not go nearly as well as you thought.
- He just wants to be friends.
Whatever the reason that he doesn’t call, the fact is that he is not ready to pursue a relationship or at least not with you. This is not saying that you are not relationship-worthy. It simply may be that the two of you lack the chemistry needed to maintain a long-term relationship. Now, if you are in a relationship and he neglects to call, that is a complete different story. There may be a number of reasons why a man who is committed does not call when he says that he will, few of them are ever good reasons.
Women like to know what is going on. In fact, women NEED to know what is going on. Communication is essential and women simply need to know where the relationship is headed or if there is even a relationship to consider. Men seldom bother with women that they are not interested in. While he may tell you that he will call for another date or say something like “I’ll talk to you soon”, if he isn’t interested then you are likely not going to hear from him again. Some men, and these are very few and far between, may actually tell you upfront that they are not interested or that they did not feel chemistry. Others however, will simply let you sit by the phone and wait.
The chances that he was injured in an accident, his mother died or he fell down a mine shaft are very slim. The chance that he simply does not plan to call you is much greater. Understand that about 15 percent of all men do not call back because they fear rejection. Of course, if you told him to call you then his rejection is unfounded. Maybe you did not express your interest clearly enough or come right out and spell it out for him. Whatever the reason that he hasn’t called, the fact remains that he hasn’t called and you need to know what you should do next.
Most men will agree that if he hasn’t called within three days, you should consider it a moot point. Set a deadline for yourself and after three days, consider that he simply is not into you as a romantic interest. You should not sit by the phone chewing your nails and waiting for him to dial your number. You have much more interesting things to do than to wait on him. Live your own life and do not spend any more time worrying about whether or not he knows how to use a phone. If he has not called back within two or three days at the most, forget about him and move on.
Some will tell you to call him and some will tell you not to call him. This is actually your call. If you feel that you really connected and you simply want to be sure, particularly if he gave you his number then go ahead and give him a ring. Just try not to be too disappointed if you get his answering service. If he is really not interested then chances are he won’t even answer when you call. Do not be tempted to leave message after message or stalk his Facebook page leaving comments. You are not a desperate woman so do not act like one. Remember that there are plenty of other fish in the sea. If this one goes missing then simply bait your hook and catch another.
Try not to overanalyze the situation. If he hasn’t called then he simply hasn’t called and you are now free to move on. You may never know why he neglected to call you. If this is supposed to be a serious relationship then by all means you should find out why he has neglected to check in. however, if you have only been on one or two dates, simply let it go. If he does not call you then it is his loss. You have a lot to give and if he cannot see that then he does not deserve your attention. Do not let his lack of calling cause you to feel insecure about yourself. Men will play head games if you allow them to – do not allow him to get to you. If you allow him to make you feel insecure then this may trickle down to the next date with the next great guy. Insecurities could ruin a good future relationship. Keep your options open and simply go out with someone else.
Again, there could be a million reasons why he has not called. Try not to think about the why, simply think about the fact that he hasn’t called and move on. Whether he is not interested, is afraid of commitment or simply wants to see how long you will hang on while he keeps you dangling, no man is worth you losing sleep over. Give him a couple of days and barring any unforeseen reasons for his lack of calling (in case he actually did fall down a mine shaft) after your deadline is up then just move on. You will find that men respect you much more when you do not appear desperate. Be confident and show him that you have better things to do with your time than waiting by the phone for him.
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especially in my situation right now. absolutely helpful.. i shluld move on to the next date