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It hurts badly enough when a stranger or someone you really do not care for betrays you. When the one that you love betrays you however, it can be utterly devastating. You may feel as if you will never recover and wonder what in the world you did that would warrant such a betrayal. Although it may seem impossible to come back from this, you can pick up and move on.
Being hurt from the one person you thought would never hurt you is tough. The one person that you thought you could count on is the one person who turned around and backstabbed you. You may have questions about your relationship. You may wonder why this happened and when your relationship changed to the point that he felt the need to betray you. You may have a million questions that quite honestly, you probably will never be able to fully answer. The simple truth is that if he betrayed you then he really was not the trustworthy person you believed him to be. This has no bearing on you as a woman. It simply means that you inadvertently placed your trust in the wrong person.
There are a number of reasons why people betray others. These betrayals can be accidental or deliberate. It could be that he really did not mean to hurt you and then again, he could simply be someone that does not deserve your love or your trust. It is important that you understand that you are not to blame when someone else breaks your trust. You have to protect yourself and do everything in your power to look out for your own best interests. Sometimes feelings change and that person may not be as head over heels for you as he once was. Whatever the reason, there are many things that you can do to help yourself get over this betrayal and learn to love again.
You will need to allow yourself to grieve. This is an important step. Allow yourself to cry, scream, throw things if necessary and anything else that you need to do to begin healing from this betrayal. If confronting the one who betrayed you will help you to move on, then by all means confront away. It is critical that you allow yourself to grieve the betrayal in order to learn to love and trust again. Understand that you will have waves of sadness, anger and guilt. These are all part of the grieving process. Allow yourself to feel all of these emotions and any others that may come along. Remember that you are the victim here. You are the one who has been betrayed and you have a right to all of your feelings.
If you have chosen to end the relationship as a result of this betrayal, stand your ground. If you are certain that you will never be able to trust this person again then keep yourself from taking him back simply because you miss him. You will undoubtedly have episodes of longing to feel his touch once again or just to hear his voice. You have to push on through this and remember what brought you to this point in the first place. If he betrayed you once, are you certain that he will not betray you a second time? Keep this in mind before you quickly forgive and allow him to come back to you. Of course, there are times when the person who betrayed you may genuinely be sorry and will never do something like this again. The actual decision on whether or not you can trust this person again is ultimately yours.
If you do decide to repair your relationship, do so on your terms. Again, you were the victim and you have the right to protect yourself from further hurt. Make sure that you set rules for the relationship. If counseling is needed, then ensure that you are both willing to go to counseling together. Again, you are the only one who can truly decide if the relationship is worth saving. Take your time and weight your options before you decide to continue in a relationship with someone who has hurt you.
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