Infidelity is one of the hardest blows that a marriage can take. Trust is one of the most important building blocks for any relationship and once that trust is broken it can be very difficult to gain it back. If your marriage has undergone infidelity and you are worried that you will never again be able to trust your spouse, take heart. There is a way for you to learn to trust your husband again and get past this hurdle that seems to be blocking your marriage from happier days.
One of the most effective ways to re-establish trust is to open up honest communication. Once the trust has been broken in your marriage you may feel lied to. It is very important to get past this feeling and to bring honesty back into your relationship. You must be prepared to answer any questions that your spouse asks you honestly and openly. If it was you who broke the trust in your relationship then you must give him honest answers to all his questions in order for him to begin to trust again. On the other hand if you were the victim of infidelity then you must allow your spouse to offer his answers.
You must also allow yourself to forgive him. Forgiveness is the most important aspect of surviving infidelity. If you never forgive him for what he has done then there really is no hope of your marriage ever surviving. Letting go of the hurt and anger that you feel may be difficult but you must move past these emotions if you hope to salvage your marriage. Forgiveness is a process that must be endured for a marriage to survive such a breach of trust. It is also a two-way street. You must forgive him for his infidelity and he must forgive you of any wrongdoings that you have done. Neglect, emotional and verbal abuse and other negative aspects such as these must be dealt with and overcome before you can truly begin to heal. Forgiving him for his indiscretion does not mean that you must approve of his cheating. It simply means that you are willing to let go of the anger and pain that you feel, as well as inclinations of payback and revenge, and begin to put your relationship back together. If you can not forgive him then your marriage will forever be clouded by resentment. Think of it this way - have you forgiven people in the past for doing things to you that were hurtful? This is basically the same thing. You can find forgiveness if you really want to. It will take time but it will come. Forgiving him will only help to strengthen your marriage as well as make you feel better inside.
It may be necessary for you to seek marriage counseling. There are many wonderful counselors who specialize in treatment of broken trust issues. If you find that you are having too much difficulty working through your marital problems on your own then seek counseling. A marriage counselor can help you to understand why cheating happens and ways in which to build a stronger and more trusting relationship than you had before.
The thing is that if you do nothing your marriage will be worth nothing. If you truly love your husband and believe that he has remorse for what has happened then your marriage is absolutely worth salvaging. Don’t be naïve about this. It will take work and lots of it. But, with the right attitude and the true desire to have a healthy and happy marriage, you can make this work for both of you.