When you are first married everything seems wonderful. Most newlyweds think that marriage is simply the most blissful experience of their lives. However, after you have been married for a few years it may seem like the honeymoon is truly over. Marriage is a constant work in progress. Keeping a marriage healthy and happy will take patience, love and time but it can be done. In fact, there are many marriages that have lasted for 75 years or more, mostly because the couples understood how to keep their marriage fresh and new even after nearly a century of being together.
Working on your marriage is something that you will need to do from the “I do” stage until the very end. Marriages require constant attention and the minute that you stop working on it is the very minute that it begins to fail. Even if you feel that you have all the answers and you are happily experiencing the most blissful of marriages, there is work to be done. Marriage also requires many sacrifices, on both parts as well as attention. Many limericks have been written about marriages resembling gardens and needing constant care and attention. This is very true. A marriage will simply fall apart if you stop paying attention to it. You must take the time to work on your marriage at all times. Never take it for granted and nourish it with thoughtful gestures and loving sacrifices.
Communication is one of the most important aspects of a healthy and happy marriage. You should never leave anything unsaid. If you have feelings about a specific subject then you should voice those feelings. Bottling things up will simply lead to resentments. Even if you feel that your husband or wife will not appreciate your feelings on specific matters, you must voice them. Note that voicing your feelings should be done only to your spouse. Bringing others into the marriage such as siblings, coworkers or friends is simply not a good idea. You should never tell others how you feel about a specific situation with your spouse, particularly if you have not told your spouse. Also, you may feel that your spouse should know what you are feeling but unless they have been certified as a psychic then chances are they have absolutely no idea how you are feeling. Never assume that they know how you feel unless you actually tell them.
Spending time together is very important and without doing so you could be setting yourself up for marriage failure. It is important that you make time to spend together. Many couples after a few years of marriage and several children, simply do not feel that they have time to be romantic. This is a critical step in keeping your marriage alive. The key here is in making time to be together. Never simply take time that you have available. You need to make it a point to create time for each other. You also need to make time for your specific goals and this goes for both you and your spouse. Never assume that your needs are greater than the needs of your spouse. You are equal partners in this marriage and you should treat each other equally. You both have ambitions and goals and balancing those goals is important.
There are a number of things that can cause a marriage to go stale. Keeping your marriage fresh is important, particularly after the ten year mark. Spending time together, supporting each other and expressing your feelings are all integral parts of a healthy and happy marriage.